Those of you that know anything about me, perhaps have perused the site a bit, know I make a lot of web connected crap. One example that stands out is my computerized smelter. This device has a net connected micro controller that receives instructions from a web server to process cycles of heating and cooling and so on. The other thing it does is send me SMS notifications when a cycle completes or all cycles are complete or when things go south and it stops responding so I can run out and prevent the shop from burning down.
Or at least it used to
Now it doesn’t. I wasn’t entirely sure why for a bit but now I know it’s the stupidest reason I can think of. Apparently the Federal Government decided it was time to put a stop to all the SMS spam we all get and the smartest people in the world (wink) put their heads together and came up with a plan. Now you may have noticed that despite this brilliant plan going into effect January 1th 2024 there has been no change to the amount SMS spam you’re getting but that’s because you, my dear, are just a pion (or is that peon? pretty small either way) and the government isn’t here for your petty concerns.
The Scheme
The geniuses’ idea was to restrict all SMS API access (yes I mean all, 100% across the board, every last shred of it) to verified corporations. Happen to be a private citizen that wants to make an app that sends SMS? Well tough shit. “You aren’t a corporation so screw you”, so sayeth the rulers on high. Happen to be a highschool kid working on a nifty science fair robot that dumps a glass of coke on your head then mocks you via SMS? Screw you. College student working on a revolutionary system to notify the Hospital automatically if your heart stops? Screw you even more, the government will decide what health care you get.
Lets register up!
Well it just so happens I have a couple corporations so lets see what happens if we do register our corporation so we can send ourselves text messages with the approval of the gods that determine our fate.
Well first you need to provide all of your corporation’s details. Then you need to wait, just keep waiting, al.. most… there…, wait for it, wait, wait, wait. AND FAILED. Yeah you need to provide the details exactly correctly so they can verified according to whatever government database you and I most likely don’t have access to. This can take days. Got a late night idea for a brilliant new app that will change the world via SMS? Well you better write it down because you are touching that API for weeks even if you already have a Corp.
So once you finally clear the verification requirement you’re no where near done. See all these carriers that offer an API are required to comply completely with this regulation and I assume would lose their FCC license if they failed to do so. So now you need to create a “campaign” (or is the camp pain? either way).
Campaigning to send myself a Text
A campaign involves laying out your entire plan for your SMS API usage. You need to provide multiple examples of the messages you will send, these need to follow specific rules as well like including your “brand name” in every message. You also need to have opt-in, opt-out, and help messages provide and defined each with a whole subset of required crap included.
The biggest thing required is the URL to your webpage containing the required Terms and Conditions info and Privacy Policy.
Pony Up or forget it
Yep that’s right. You are required to have access to web hosting so you can create a web page so you can provide terms and conditions to yourself so you can send yourself an SMS message.
The requirements of this page are extensive as well and require verification to allow your campaign to be approved. This can also take days as it seems, at least with vonage, there is, at minimum, a 24 hour turn around every time you submit a change. So the way this plays out is you see in the list of crap to fill out a mandatory field for your terms and conditions URL. You create the required page, assuming you already have the required infrastructure, and you submit your campaign (we’ll get back to the other requirements haven’t covered yet in a minute). You then wait for at least a day, then get a list of arbitrary bullshit you are required to include in your terms and conditions. You then comply and resubmit. After another 24 hours or so you get another message with a new list of non-sense you must add.
Rinse and Repeat
I have yet to actually have my campaign approved by the way. After at least a couple of weeks of screwing around I just submitted the latest revision to my campaign all so I can send myself a couple text messages a month.
Some of the other required stuff includes:
1. Standard Use Case
2. Special Use Case
3, Campaign description
4. Brand Name (whether you have one or not)
5. Use Case some more
6. Sub use case
7. Monthly billing for campaign
8. 5 sample messages including your brand name
9. Subscriber opt-in info including Opt-in flow (a description of what happens when someone opts in), Opt-in keyword, Opt-in same message including brand and opt out info, help info, terms URL.
10. Opt-out info including sample message and keyword
11. Help keyword with response sample message requiring URL and email address
12. More unexplained but required checkboxes including “age-gated content”, “number pooling”, “embedded phone number”, etc.
Conclusion
This is outrageous, egregious, and overall absolute bullshit. Unfortunately, despite the extreme overreach, you’re not likely to hear any outcry on this one because who, besides me, cares? It’s just access to SMS APIs, how many private citizens will ever have any reason to use such a thing? Well I have no idea. I know I’m one. And I know that we will never know because none of them will ever be allowed access again.
I don’t care what political party you happen to associate yourself with, they have no business messing with this stuff. This whole regulation is a clear example of them having no understanding of the things they are trying to regulate and/or oversee. Maybe if the average age of any elected official wasn’t 170 and the average IQ being half that and an advanced law degree being the only means by which to weasel your way into office some of this kind of thing wouldn’t happen. Although maybe having smart people in office would mean our rights would erode even faster.
Here’s the simple truth of all of it. Regardless of party these people think you are stupid and they think they know better than you what is best for you. Until everyone finally realizes this nothing will change. And it might be too late to change things already.
I actually thought about contacting my congressman but then I realized I could no more explain what is banned here in terms they would understand then they could and even if I could this is probably the lowest priority thing that could ever cross their desk, to them. Our government at work folks. Enjoy the spam that is unaffected and the slight reduction in your liberty.
Update
I’m working on a different project and doing loads of 3D printing in the past few days and I noticed another casualty of this mess. I use OctoPrint to provide a web interface for my printer and do a number of other things like error ID and notification. OctoPrint supports 3rd party add-ons. One in particular that I use is called OctoEverywhere which basically provides an internet facing GUI which I don’t care about but also sends SMS messages to report errors. That I do care about. Well guess what doesn’t work anymore? I’m guessing the developer, probably some kid in his parents basement, didn’t have the means to jump through the hoops for his addon to work anymore so now it’s just broken forever. Thanks The Government…